One of Those Nights

Wondering if I should move again.  Just not happy here but not unhappy either.

My wanderlust knows no bounds! Wish I had wings.

I think I need to start drinking, lol!  So jealous of those that can drink, enjoy it.  I never have.  It burns my mouth, I start to feel tired after a few sips, too many calories and a waste of money.

Love it out in the country, but sometimes I miss the noise, pollution and crime of the cities. Wait, no I don’t. I do miss the ability to shop and socialize with certain people that were always too busy for me even when I lived near them. To be fair, I was always too busy myself.

I really miss my sister!

As a writer and an artist, I am an introvert and empathic by nature.  It’s actually painful for me to socialize at times.  I love a good conversation with the right person but frankly most people bore me to tears or scare me.  Very few know how to actually converse about anything interesting, myself included unless I’m in the mood.  My sister was the extrovert and how I met some in my life that I would not have made the effort had she not been a part of my life and reached out to them.

Soon the summer will end….

and fall will begin….

My favorite time for some reason. Maybe all the pretty colors?
There’s that, Autumn colors, Pumpkin Spice, Pumpkin everything, warm woolen sweaters, bonfires, apples, cool crisp air that is so welcome after hot, humid summers.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Po’ Girl Wanders, Change

Finally in my apartment.

When I was growing up, I never heard of apartment living and we were quite poor.   Sorry, po’!  My parents seldom held jobs and we lived with or with the help from the few relatives we had at the time.  Most are no longer living and since both my parents are considered only children, I have no Aunts and Uncles to speak of.  This makes me a lonely soul even to this day, especially after losing my po’ sister or sweat sister, as she called herself.

So I have just moved into a subsidized apartment in a small town out in the country and it’s OK.  I’m counting my blessings.  After the last number of years I’ve had, I am blessed not to be homeless.  There have already been a number of things that don’t thrill me but I can imagine many places much worse than this.  I have already seen some deer and turkey buzzards flying when I look out my window which faces a woods.  Not thrilled when I see them all lined up in the trees out there casing my place.  I thought of this view as a blessing until I really looked around and see that my view is also the employee parking lot and the pick up, drop off for residents.  So evenings or weekends are less congested but there are still people going past my window smoking, which is bad when my window happens to be opened, as well a car drives past with exhaust just a few feet away.  It is still way less traveled than the road that I was living on in the big city which was used as a shortcut by many from one major road to another.  Didn’t know this until I moved in.  These are the secrets they keep from you when you are house shopping.

Always do your homework when you are about the make this kind of investment.  I no longer consider buying a home any kind of investment, but instead a gross risk to your very future.  They don’t advertise that you are gambling every time you purchase a home because for the last 50 years or so, this was not the case.  Unfortunately our government has allowed all kinds of corrupt and risky behavior from our major banks and corporations that always make money for a few at the expense of the rest of us.  This is our own fault.  All politicians need money to be re-elected each year and hence owe certain people favors once they are elected.  It’s disgusting and shameful, but they also own all the major media corporations in America and can put any kind of spin they wish to their corrupt practices.  They pay people to think up excuses for their unfair trade agreements and other unfair manipulation of our society that puts so many American citizens out of work and some out on the street, especially our put upon veterans.

Much like when I lived in my condo for many years, I have the woods as my view, not other houses.  I pray that I will be happy here and still plan on moving on when the time is right.  I plan on looking at property in the upper peninsula next year if there are any potential fixer uppers unless I really love it here and don’t think the gamble and all the hard work would be worth more freedom.  You are not free to decorate or do much of anything creative living as a tenant.  The trade-off for being helped when you need it, hopefully.  Sometimes they do not come when you need them and in my own home I was free to make sure any problem was taken care immediately.  I knew how to fix most things and could hire someone who would show up right away.  Landlords aren’t always so accommodating.  Again, still counting my blessings, especially since I am so tired after a lifetime of hard work and much stress doing everything myself, even when I was married.

This is the view that greets me most mornings.

This was my previous view:

I am finally just letting myself relax from the life of stress I once knew. I’m not saying it has not been hectic having to let my home go to foreclosure and some of my belongings that are just too old to care about even though they are still in working order. Some stuff I left behind such as two 32″ tube TVs that no one wanted and I can’t blame them. I have donated most of what I couldn’t sell in my last yard sale. I did leave all my working appliances and let the bank know this when I mailed them my keys because they told me that they won’t meet me at the home so I can give them to someone.

The bank rep suggested that I leave the keys under a mat or somewhere outside the home and I told him I could not do this because there are many people in my area that would see me do this and they could access the property instead.  Still cannot figure out why they would ask me to do this instead of meeting with one of them at the home.  There is a lot to remember of what to disconnect or shut off and what to turn for my new home.  I also had to get cable for the first time in 15 years, even though I did not really want it so I went with basic cable for the internet service.  There are absolutely NO local connections that can be found when you do the “air” search for antenna.  This is what happens when you move to the boonies.  At least I didn’t have to get a giant dish as some of my friends did that live way out in the country by themselves.

So when I got a little closer to the deer I sawOctMiscHiddenLakeGarden 017
I this is what I found! OctMiscHiddenLakeGarden 202

Weekly Photo Challenge: Another “New” Year

Instead of filing bankruptcy in the beginning of 2014 as I should have, after losing my part time job at the end of 2013, I tried to hang onto my house just so I did not have to go through all the stuff I am now having to go through which is bankruptcy and foreclosure, having to downsize and pack up what remains and start living a completely different way of life.  So that kind of explains why I chose to try to find another job that never materialized and drain what little savings I once had to almost nothing in the vain attempt to stave off the inevitable as long as I could.  I can’t see any reason to stay here any longer since my balloon payments are due to begin this year and I would be paying an additional $450 or more a month.  I will be able to just make most of my bills, since I stopped making my mortgage payments now, with the small social security income I had to start drawing on earlier than I planned to.

I didn’t bother to rent my home out due to the amount of rent I would have had to charge this year and I was advised against just signing the house over or wasting my time seeing if a short sale would fly considering that I have two mortgages.  I will have to see how my foreclosure plays out to see where I’m actually going to be living when I leave here.  I have managed to get some applications in cities where I wanted to live, so depending on how soon I have to leave, and who has an opening at that same time, determines where I actually move to.  There is a place a few blocks away from my house that has a month to month lease option that sounds promising, though eventually I want to get out of this dirty city and all the memories.  Some of my family is still trying to talk me into moving to the upper most part of the Upper Peninsula in Michigan where they are now currently 20 below in wind chill and have already had over 2 feet of snow.  Snowfalls are beautiful, within reason, but I am no fan of winter.

Still no lotto wins, but I never give up hope and keep buying one for each major drawing in my area.  The Lottery is the carrot that dangles before the working rich and poor alike and the fact that I once knew someone who shared in one of the bigger jackpots, keeps me playing cause I know people can actually win it.

I can choose to move into a cheap apartment for people over a certain age that are income based because they have them all over.  I could also take out the remaining pension I have and purchase some little fixer-upper like one of my brothers did many years ago.  He made some low offer in cash that was accepted and it was his.  He did have to put a lot of money into it once he moved it though.  Money that I don’t have.  One of my other brothers could have done the same thing when he moved up by him this year, but decided to just rent a cheap but nice apartment with all utilities included in these, his declining years.

Tough call for me.

I am very handy myself and would have help from the rest of my family to make most repairs.  By draining my small pension I will only be short $150. per month as a monthly annuity that I would be applying to apartment living should I rent.  The taxes in some areas of the Upper Peninsula are super cheap, like $300 to $600 a year.  So I figure my monthly payment for my tax, insurance and utilities would be approximately $300 per month, which is cheaper than any apartment.  If I happen to get a money pit, then it will cost me a lot more than that and after a bankruptcy, if I needed credit for any major repair, my interest would be through the roof.

Or I could move to an apartment, like my one brother, in an area that is very popular with tourists and it will feel like I’m on vacation all the time.  I could really be free to do any free or cheap thing I feel like with no maintenance or responsibility and absolutely no snow-blowing all winter long!  Sometimes that sounds great to me, but I am so independent and used to love living creatively.  I guess if I go apartment, I might actually think of stopping Po’ Girl Shines since I have not been using it to make the kinds of posts I planned on initially and it does not look like many people see my posts.  I guess I really do have to blog or get off the spot this year.

I don’t want to just post an occasional pretty picture or a recipe.  I really wanted to be providing information that people could use.

I will see what happens.

Few examples of various art projects from years ago to current.  I love experimenting with various computer software on my photographs.  A couple were just fooling around on blank part of 35mm negatives and then scanning/printing them to see what they look like.


Weekly Photo Challenge: Resolved

I am resolved to keep moving forward even though I am tempted to give up, quit or otherwise be very scared and lazy.

I am resolved to post more information to help people with their daily lives.

I am resolved to finally market my self-published tax self-help book this year.

I am resolved to finding a permanent home this year to nest until I really get to go home. 

Even though I can't see the finish line, I will just keep trucken'!
Even though I can’t see the finish line, I will just keep trucken’!

Come On, Move It!

I am not going to waste your time on this site by posting any actual exercises.  There are many of them and most movement is good for you.  The main thing to remember is walking is the best exercise and most natural. We need to be sure to use the upper body to maintain strength as we age. Exercising with small weights can help. As an ex-dancer and dance teacher, I know what a great work out dancing is.
Anyone who has seen Dancing With The Stars can see how many of the contestants lose weight while on the show.  Belly Dancing is a sensual way to become attune to your body as you tone it! It is important not to overdo any exercise and check with your Dr if you have any health issues or are obese before you try anything strenuous.
Working out with others gives people more incentive. You might try checking out your local school’s continuing education programs for any dance or fitness classes that seem reasonable.  Don’t become obsessive about the latest diet or exercise, you need to find a way to move in everything that you do, to incorporate exercise, so you don’t feel like it is something you have to do, it is something your body wants to feel.  The glorious feeling of being stretched and relaxed, not worn out!

Exercise can never be overrated.

Your overall fitness and health depends more on exercise or lack thereof, then your diet when it comes to weight loss and muscle tone.

As long as you are not actually overeating, taking in more calories than you burn and eating really bad, fatty foods, you should be able to eat what you want in reasonable portion sizes and be able to lose or maintain your weight if you move enough.

I knew people that never did structured exercise in their life, but between gardening, having very clean houses, taking occasional walks
and going out dancing once a week, they had great figures even with their healthy appetites.  You never want to be sloth-like, laying or
sitting around all the time.  It is dangerous to lose so much muscle tone, as well as potentially causing blood clots to form.
The more muscle you lose, the more cellulite appears in its place.  Ask any ex-dancer!blondgirl2