Windows. Mostly on the outside looking in, sort of like my life.
Things are left behind for various reasons.
Sometimes it’s part of your heart.
Some of us have had to leave our homes in the past and go on to other adventures in our lives.
Sometimes it’s people we love or used to. Sometimes it’s the life we used to live.
Sometimes we are leaving actual “things” behind. Things we paid for but of no real value. The false importance we placed on the “thing” due to some great marketing campaign and the idea of keeping our economy viable. Truth is, the more things we leave behind, the more we can actually start living again. Many born past 1980 never got to live, they have been “consuming” since birth.
Finally in my apartment.
When I was growing up, I never heard of apartment living and we were quite poor. Sorry, po’! My parents seldom held jobs and we lived with or with the help from the few relatives we had at the time. Most are no longer living and since both my parents are considered only children, I have no Aunts and Uncles to speak of. This makes me a lonely soul even to this day, especially after losing my po’ sister or sweat sister, as she called herself.
So I have just moved into a subsidized apartment in a small town out in the country and it’s OK. I’m counting my blessings. After the last number of years I’ve had, I am blessed not to be homeless. There have already been a number of things that don’t thrill me but I can imagine many places much worse than this. I have already seen some deer and turkey buzzards flying when I look out my window which faces a woods. Not thrilled when I see them all lined up in the trees out there casing my place. I thought of this view as a blessing until I really looked around and see that my view is also the employee parking lot and the pick up, drop off for residents. So evenings or weekends are less congested but there are still people going past my window smoking, which is bad when my window happens to be opened, as well a car drives past with exhaust just a few feet away. It is still way less traveled than the road that I was living on in the big city which was used as a shortcut by many from one major road to another. Didn’t know this until I moved in. These are the secrets they keep from you when you are house shopping.
Always do your homework when you are about the make this kind of investment. I no longer consider buying a home any kind of investment, but instead a gross risk to your very future. They don’t advertise that you are gambling every time you purchase a home because for the last 50 years or so, this was not the case. Unfortunately our government has allowed all kinds of corrupt and risky behavior from our major banks and corporations that always make money for a few at the expense of the rest of us. This is our own fault. All politicians need money to be re-elected each year and hence owe certain people favors once they are elected. It’s disgusting and shameful, but they also own all the major media corporations in America and can put any kind of spin they wish to their corrupt practices. They pay people to think up excuses for their unfair trade agreements and other unfair manipulation of our society that puts so many American citizens out of work and some out on the street, especially our put upon veterans.
Much like when I lived in my condo for many years, I have the woods as my view, not other houses. I pray that I will be happy here and still plan on moving on when the time is right. I plan on looking at property in the upper peninsula next year if there are any potential fixer uppers unless I really love it here and don’t think the gamble and all the hard work would be worth more freedom. You are not free to decorate or do much of anything creative living as a tenant. The trade-off for being helped when you need it, hopefully. Sometimes they do not come when you need them and in my own home I was free to make sure any problem was taken care immediately. I knew how to fix most things and could hire someone who would show up right away. Landlords aren’t always so accommodating. Again, still counting my blessings, especially since I am so tired after a lifetime of hard work and much stress doing everything myself, even when I was married.
This is the view that greets me most mornings.
This was my previous view:
I am finally just letting myself relax from the life of stress I once knew. I’m not saying it has not been hectic having to let my home go to foreclosure and some of my belongings that are just too old to care about even though they are still in working order. Some stuff I left behind such as two 32″ tube TVs that no one wanted and I can’t blame them. I have donated most of what I couldn’t sell in my last yard sale. I did leave all my working appliances and let the bank know this when I mailed them my keys because they told me that they won’t meet me at the home so I can give them to someone.
The bank rep suggested that I leave the keys under a mat or somewhere outside the home and I told him I could not do this because there are many people in my area that would see me do this and they could access the property instead. Still cannot figure out why they would ask me to do this instead of meeting with one of them at the home. There is a lot to remember of what to disconnect or shut off and what to turn for my new home. I also had to get cable for the first time in 15 years, even though I did not really want it so I went with basic cable for the internet service. There are absolutely NO local connections that can be found when you do the “air” search for antenna. This is what happens when you move to the boonies. At least I didn’t have to get a giant dish as some of my friends did that live way out in the country by themselves.
Some squirrels have made themselves at “home” in a tree in my backyard. I could tell by the insulation that we would be in for a cold winter.
Apparently they raided my neighbors patio cushions and pulled out the stuffing to insulate it. So stylish & cozy!